I can't watch pbs sober anymore
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize