cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
The guy you fucked with the lazy eye is here, im avoiding contact by texting you. But i just looked up and he recognizes me, theres no way he doesnt. I'd remember the girl who called me quasimodo all night too. Sober me feels so bad.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
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