What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
there's paper in my vomit.
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Randomize
