Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
Randomize
