idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
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