ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
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