We won't sleep together?
I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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