Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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