It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize