First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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