Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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