well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
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