I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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