Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Randomize
