Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
