just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Randomize
