Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize