Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
