I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Randomize