Having a random hookup so left but love u
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize