Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize