"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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