She said her name was "party"
there's paper in my vomit.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
