Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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