Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
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I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
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I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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