no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
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