i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
