Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
Just saw a man being put through a dui test on the side of the road... it was noon and he was on a bicycle. God bless texas.
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
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