I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize
