The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Randomize
