What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
