plz talk dirty to me
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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