i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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