I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
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