i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
Randomize
