She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
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She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
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