I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
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