you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize