i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
Randomize
