Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize