I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
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