sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
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