Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
