I like my sex mixed with concussions.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
we're making bets on your personal life
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Randomize