if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
To celebrate the holidays this evening, I will be replying “FUCK YOU” to all my spam emails. Can’t tell you how excited I am
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize