We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
My roomate had an hour long melt down about her life choices not realizing I was in the middle of having sex... So yea it went pretty horribly.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
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