im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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