After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Randomize
