That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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