Dual....:-)
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
Randomize